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Brain injury survivor continues road to recovery
Editor’s note: Sarah Barker received a brain injury in an automobile accident in 1996, the summer before her senior year at Bettendorf High School. Her recovery has been the subject of several QUAD-CITY TIMES stories over the years. Today, the Scott Community College student updates us on her progress.
Crash! Then silence.
That was the sound of what my life was like directly after the crash.
I lay in a coma for three months — but that was the easy part. The hard part came when I didn’t know if I would ever walk again. I constantly had reassurance from my physical therapist, though, that it was all going to turn out, and it was just a matter of healing and hard work. I can’t tell you how many times he must have repeated that to me. We would just get done talking about it and then five minutes later I would ask again, not remembering I had just asked.
Even though the brain-injured patient may constantly forget that, reassurance is so important in the healing process. When these things would happen I didn’t feel sad, and I couldn’t cry. That was my brain’s way of saying, “I don’t think you can handle this right now.”
Even eight years later I still have a hard time crying. I think it’s my body’s own way of protecting me. Kind of like I’ve already had to endure enough pain; let’s just take a break for awhile.
‘Social butterfly’My life up until that unfortunate evening when my accident occurred had really been fairly typical. I grew up the youngest of four kids. However, I am the youngest only by one minute. This is because I have a twin brother, and rest assured Kevin would never let me forget that he was the older brother.
Growing up, Kevin and I were fairly close because our two older siblings, Thad and Kelley, were both in school by that time. My mother says that my brother and I used to spend hours building pretend villages all over the floor around our living room. We did a lot together with other kids because at the time our mother had a daycare and worked part-time as an obstetrics nurse at Genesis Medical Center, Davenport. My father was home in the evenings and on weekends as he was director of the Scott County Health Department during the day.
My years growing up were full of activity. My dad used to call me the “social butterfly” because I was always flittering somewhere. My life was filled with the normal childhood activities. I took gymnastics and played soccer, doing cartwheels in the backfield. I was also a Brownie where I was one of three Sarahs in the troop.
The first years of my teenage life were equally as good. Early in my teen years I discovered the telephone. My parents claimed from that point on none of the calls were ever for them. My previous life as a social butterfly continued.
My first three years of high school were a blast. I had fun with my friends, participating in sports, and doing a variety of other extracurricular activities. I loved the work I did at River City Café as a hostess. I made good grades, all except for math, that is. Math was the dreaded subject for me. When I was 17, it was that I simply couldn’t grasp the concept of that high of a level of math. By the time I was 18, no one knew if I would be able to add 1 plus1 again.
The accidentJuly 30, 1996 was the day where my life was turned upside down, and it would never, ever be the same again.
According to what I’ve been told, that day was a very full one for me. My mom, sister and I decided to have a “girl’s day.” We had lunch at Subway, just talking and trading gossip with each other. Then we were excited to go to the new Super Target — a big deal in 1996. We made sure that we also went to Wal-Mart, because we didn’t want them to feel bad because everyone was going to Super Target.
I was looking forward to that night because I was going to the fair with a friend to see country singer Patty Loveless. My friend’s mother picked me up about 8 p.m. that night, and we stopped at the Hardees on 53rd Street in Davenport to get some dinner. When we came to the stoplight at the intersection of 53rd Street and Welcome Way, somebody ran the red light, and there was a crash.I received the full impact of the crash, while nobody else was injured. I ended up suffering a traumatic brain injury and spent the next two years of my life in intensive rehabilitation. I continue to go back for outpatient rehab to this day as I get to a new place in my recovery, and find something I would like to work on.
My walking and memory were affected greatly. Probably the biggest deficit I still face to this day is with my memory. To begin with, my memory had the time span of about five minutes. Currently, with my diligence to work at it, and my positive attitude, it is at a much more functional level. It can always improve, which I will probably continue to work on for the rest of my life. Truthfully, I have to admit, the only reason I’m able to remember anything I’m telling you is because of what other people have told me over the years.
Basically, I don’t have any memory of the six months prior to my accident, and my memory is spotty for the six months before that.
I have gone on to graduate from high school despite missing my whole senior year, and am slowly striving to attain my two-year associates degree from Scott Community College. I’m currently taking one class a semester, only because it would be difficult to switch between multiple subjects. I’m going very slowly but I’m doing extremely well.
The majority of the subjects I’ve taken have been in the English and communications area. One thing I’ve learned is that I can’t rush through anything. I have to go about things incredibly slowly. Otherwise I would get frustrated, overwhelmed and would do poor work. I’m also a free-lance correspondent for the Quad-City Times, and I speak about my experiences and about injury prevention for different community groups and schools.
I am very passionate about injury prevention, and one of the ways I feel I can convey that is by lecturing to high school age kids. I want to let these kids know I was exactly their age when this happened to me, and they are not invincible, and to take the proper precautions when driving or riding in a vehicle.
I recently completed doing a semester-long internship at Trinity Medical Center in their public relations department. I believe I am setting precedence for other brain injury survivors, that if you truly want something bad enough, that nothing is impossible.
I have had to work terrifically hard to get where I am today. But I was determined from the very beginning that when all was said and done I was going to make a success of myself, because when life hands you a lemon, you make lemonade. I still have to work hard not to get burned out. It’s just a way of life. I have always had to work hard at anything I’ve ever done, and I’m not going to change now.
If I were going to offer any advice to someone who has suffered a brain injury, it would be to always strive to do things people think you will not be able to do. There’s no better feeling than proving people wrong.
David Heitz assisted the writer with this essay.
Reprinted with permission. © 2005, Quad-City Times, Davenport, IA A Lee Enterprises subsidiary.